Tuesday's Rule #14
Question & Answer
“Albert grunted. ‘Do you know what happens to lads who ask too many questions?’
Mort thought for a moment.
‘No,’ he said eventually, ‘what?’
There was silence.
Then Albert straightened up and said, ‘Damned if I know. Probably they get answers, and serve ‘em right.’”
-Terry Pratchett, Mort.
Welcome to this week’s edition of Tuesday’s Rule! A weekly breakdown of a “life rule” I’ve found interesting or useful.
Tuesday’s Rule focuses on ‘rules’… Obviously.
Rules can act as answers.
Applicable answers aimed at provoking thought.
But, if reflection and thought provocation is an aim, incorporating questions could be just as effective...
I was thinking about how to work in this idea when this quote found me:
"Questions are the answers you might need."
When faced with a challenging situation or confronted by something we need to figure out, we spend energy searching for answers.
In many instances, we may be better served by first making sure we're asking the right questions.
Asking a question can be life-changing. Just ask Oliver Twist.
So this weeks rule is about questions.
This image is pretty straightforward.
If you realise you don't know something and shrug your shoulders, that's that; the possibilities are limited.
The possibilities are significantly greater if you realise you don't know something and follow up with questions and curiosity.
It’s hard to narrow down to a few scenarios in which asking good, thoughtful questions is helpful.
Advice about job interviews often suggests that the questions you ask are just as important as how you answer the questions put to you.
That's in part because curiosity is often cited as the most important attribute to determine whether a person is going to be successful.
Eleanor Roosevelt is quoted as saying, "I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift would be curiosity."
Asking questions is the crystallisation of curiosity.
Closed mouths don’t get fed is another encapsulation of why asking questions is important. If you don’t ask, you don’t get. The squeaky wheel gets all the oil.
Making sure your desires and asks are known about is one way of “expanding your luck surface area”. A rule that we looked at the value of last week (TR13).
But questions don’t always need to be asked of others or the world.
In fact, the most important questions we ask are often the ones we ask ourselves.
This idea reminded me of a section in Tim Ferriss’ interview with Matthew McConaughey, where McConaughey was talking about internal dialogue.1
“These dialogues, let’s talk about those. That old adage, “Oh, don’t talk to yourself.”
What? Bullshit! Do talk to yourself. What I think we need to remember to do is when we’re asking ourselves these questions, just make sure we answer. If all we’re doing is asking ourselves questions, but never coming up with an answer, well, that can lead to some very imbalanced insanity at times.”
This is how we get to know ourselves. Listening to and answering our own questions.
Every one of us is different. However, for the most successful and respected people, self-awareness is a trait that is universal.
This week’s rule was going to be something simple like “Ask Questions”. But that felt too obvious, and basic. So instead, it’s:
Answer Your Own Questions
Big, small, deep, shallow. Doesn’t really matter.
Some might take a while to answer. Some you might already know the answer. Some might just help you think about what to do for the rest of the day.
Whatever they are, probably wise to try and avoid ‘unbalanced insanity’ and give them a crack.
Intending to unpack some of the most important and interesting questions, Tuesday's Rule is going to swap out a rule for a question for the next three weeks (15,16 & 17).
A question designed to do precisely what TR looks to do every week. Provoke thought and provide practical application for increasing intentionality.
These aren’t going to be big, existential questions like “what is the meaning of life”.
Rather, simple, logical questions that have helped me get unstuck, and think about things a bit differently.
See you next week for question #1.
https://tim.blog/2020/10/19/matthew-mcconaughey/